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 "That's not flying, that's falling...with style!"

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Posts : 15
Join date : 2017-04-05
Age : 22
Location : Roswell, NM

PostSubject: "That's not flying, that's falling...with style!"   Thu May 11, 2017 9:49 pm

Scene One: “You agreed to what?”

Wulf's video blog fades into action in his kitchen in the early hours of friday morning, as Wulf is clad in a plain black tracksuit with a zip-up hoodie, and he is seen grabbing a bottle of spring water from the cooler and then dumping his breakfast bowl and utensils in the dishwasher and back-kicking the door shut..

[Wulf Erikson]: Love me some dishes, right Cosmo?”

Wulf gives the camera an ironic smirk as he shakes his head..the time for fun and games has passed..

[Wulf Erikson]: "In all seriousness, this match, though. What an arrangement it is. On paper, some might say that it's extremely lopsided. And well, for any normal team, it would be. One problem with that theory, though: just like our opponents in this upcoming contest we ain't your average 3 person team!

Wulf ties his dreads back out of his face and pulls up the hood..

[Wulf Erikson]: “See on one side of the ring, we have by far the three largest XHW competitors staring down the barrel of the three smallest! Do we have a deathwish? Do the bookers think that these larger guys and gal needed three punching bags to practice on? Like we're going to be a walk in the park and we're just there to make the bigger wrestlers look good? Heh. Nahhhh. Sorry, it ain't gonna play out that way. It was never going to play out that way. We're smaller, but that doesn't mean we're not some of the more fearsome opponents you can encounter!”

Wulf gives the viewer a stone cold stare while he speaks..but that quickly fades as he remembers his last XHW outing..

[Wulf Erikson]: "Speaking of fearsome, I have to hand it to my good buddy, the future of female wrestling, Ashley Williams. I am absolutely rapt to find that I will be working alongside her this week, as opposed to against her! She may be compact, but that woman is a beast, I tells ya! Future my ass, this gal is THE standing example of modern women's wrestling! And Angela Vaughn. All three of us are fast and we're sharper than most care to imagine, but this is the dark horse you need to keep your eyes on. Heck, even we need to keep an eye on her in more ways than one! With some more in-ring experience on her side, this girl is going places, mark my words! In reality, it would be a grave error should Douglas and Virginia choose to underestimate the three of us. We're going to take them to hell and back as it is, these opponents of ours can't afford to be unaware of exactly what kind of hell is being brought direct to their doorsteps!"

The viewer via the camera is on the receiving end of another patented smirk..

[Wulf Erikson]: "Though, you probably noticed how I didn't include Cosmo in that equation. The reasoning is that it would be an utter waste of time. I respect the hell out of what Cosmo has accomplished already in his young career. Though, he is already falling into the arrogance trap. He has already taken it upon himself to outright underestimate us. He's already buried the hell out of us to anyone who will listen and a few who couldn't give a shit. Literally, even his freakin' grandmama. Cosmo has already counted us out and he pretty much thinks that XHW should just automatically crown his dumb ass. While I do respect what Cosmo can do out there, I find it hard to respect Wystan Cooper, the man. The XHW Medal of Honor holder is probably busily devising some crooked scheme to steal yet another match instead of you know, studying his opponents and devising ways of out-wrestling them. But what can you do? Over-confident grinning idiots will be over-confident grinning idiots".

Wulf does a parody imitation of Cosmo's trademark grin, his head rocking from side to side, before he scratches the side of his nose with his middle finger..

[Wulf Erikson]: "I keed, Cosmo, I keed. Well, mostly. Cosmo Cooper may be a super hungry competitor. He may be undefeated and he is a tremendously able talent in his own right. The smart money is on this guy being a future World champion in any given company he chooses. Though, there is an abundance of over-confident grinning idiots in this sport of ours. They all get their comeuppance. Karma is a fickle bitch. Wystan Cooper seems to be the leader of the pack in the over-confident grinning idiot stakes. A little humility would do him wonders! He'll learn, though. The hard way, almost certainly. Though he will learn. Maybe. I hope for his sake he does, anyway”.

Wulf rolls his eyes as though he knows not to hold his breath..

[Wulf Erikson]: “That's neither here nor there, though. See, to date, it's difficult to think of a match where this Cosmo guy has actually won fairly! Also, somewhere in his fucked up little mind, he feels the need to brag about these 'wins'. Like, what? I can't even. Then again, this is the same guy who kissed a championship after he rubbed it on his gonads, right on the same spot even. Who knows what this guy is truly capable of, if he's happy to kiss his own ball sweat. It's shudder-worthy to be perfectly frank".

Just to sell the illusion, Wulf mock-shudders. He utters a sarcastic 'BRRR' to accompany it..

[Wulf Erikson]: "On the real, a victory is a victory, and I can begrudgingly admit that Cosmo deserves his spot at the top of the XHW food chain. I say begrudgingly, because in all honesty, Cosmo has showcased his cunning, his street smarts and his ingenuity in spades. Though since poking eyes, grabbing tights and feet on the ropes seem to be Cosmo's specialty manoeuvres, it's hard to say that he has showcased a heck of a lot of the legitimate skill becoming of the wrestler he'll tell you that he is. I dunno, man. I can't make that tough call. You guys can be the judge!"

Wulf points to the viewers of his video blog via the camera with a wink..

[Wulf Erikson]: "But enough about human embodiments of feminine hygiene products, this here is serious business!”

Wulf sits on the edge of the kitchen bench as he starts doing up his sneakers while he talks..

[Wulf Erikson]: "You see, our Angela had a nightmare of a week, and she may not have the experience that the rest of us in this match have, but since she has been alternating training with Ashley and myself, she has come a LONG way already. She is due to surprise the crap out of everyone, and I firmly believe that this is the match in which she will do it. And Ashley..man, not once but twice, Ashley and I have put on absolute clinics since we have been on the scene. We have quite possibly put on the most entertaining and skillful contests that the XHW faithful have had the privilege of baring witness to. You think I'm just talkin' out my ass since I was involved in these bouts? Watch the matches, listen to the crowd reactions we are getting, the fluidity of our movement.."

He looks up to the ceiling, inhaling deeply and slowly exhaling with a smile as he recounts the match again..

[Wulf Erikson]: "The desperation and determination on our faces, the psychology at work, the technical mastery, the picturesque aerial hang-time, the never before seen moves..the thrill of it all.."

Wulf chuckles and shakes his head, mouthing 'wow', before continuing..

[Wulf Erikson]: "The finish to our match last week, it was the exact reverse mirror image of what transpired in our original outing on the maiden broadcast. This time, in an amazing display of technical ability and strength, Ashley reversed my Wit's end into her patented ERASE/REWIND and I will tell you something for nothing - that hurt like hell. For a few seconds I felt my body go numb before it all went black for me. And that was all Ashley needed. Congratulations, Ashley. We're even in every single way you can think of, and as a fun side-note, it didn't affect our friendship one iota!"

Wulf fist-bumps the camera lens gently, directed at Ashley..

[Wulf Erikson]: “Yo, I kind of feel bad for our resident muscle queen, Virginia Stone. I feel bad for our resident bearded badass, Dougie Armitage. These two are somewhat decent and capable people, and they have to team with that pompous ass. I'm calling it now. I can almost envision Dougie and Ginny tiring of Cosmo's shit and stomping his guts out by the halfway point of the match. 'Fuck the match, we've got a brand new trampoline', they'll say. Neither of them are the type to put up with shit. Especially Douglas. I saw him pick up a mighty impressive debut victory last week, not only getting it over Matt Angel, but also giving that overgrown meathead Kristian Bane a pounding, and taking home the W with, ironically, his patented Bane Effect!”

Wulf gives the viewer a funny look..

[Wulf Erikson]: “I ain't even going to ask, but good for you, Beardo! However, since you decided to call me up out of the blue earlier this week and say some messed up shit, I do believe you can take your little army, spin it sideways and cram it up your furry ass. Eat a dick, you ain't no 'savior' and it's high time somebody grabbed you by your face pubes and stomped your nose into the back of your head to bring you back down to earth! I'm happy to be your humility instructor, you arrogant douche-pistol!

Wulf clears his throat, then takes a deep breath..exhaling slowly, before he continues..

[Wulf Erikson]: “So hey, Sapphire. How ya doin? Hey..you don't really want to cross a chick whose arms are bigger than your legs! It's awe inspiring, and unsettling at the same time to have to literally look up at Sapphire. The woman is muscle on muscle, she even makes those dimwit meathead jocks jealous. It's also strange to see her sign on to team with a guy who screwed her out of a match that was pretty much HERS. Very strange. It makes me wonder what goes through Ginny's head..and then again, hard pass on trying to work it out..I've got enough on my plate as it is hahaha”.

Wulf stops laughing and shoots a grin and thumbs up at the camera, directed at Sapphire, before he picks up the bottle of water and starts making his way towards the door..

[Wulf Erikson]: “I know this match is going to take it out of all six of us, this is why we all should be training our asses off instead of rattlin' our traps, but some things just need to come to the attention of some very ignorant people. That's why I'm doing this now. I'm getting it all off my chest before I hit the running trail. It's our combined talent and the high level of commitment coming from our team that is going to push us over the line. Unless Sapphire and Beardo do genuinely just end up stomping Cosmo flat..heck, we'll just grab a chair and some popcorn and let it all hang out. But much like everything at XHW there is so much that remains to be seen!”

Wulf opens his front door, the camera following him outside..

[Wulf Erikson]: “Aight, I'ma get to it..I'll see you guys out there..once again, good luck trying to contain these three powder kegs!

He locks the door behind him and leapfrogs the hedges by his front porch. The camera watches as Wulf disappears into the distance alarmingly fast, the dust billowing after his feet as he runs being the only indication that he was ever there..

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